How to Make an INTJ Feel Loved.

How to Make an INTJ Feel Loved.

Best Hobbies for INTJs

The INTJ personality type is one of the most interesting and mysterious types.

They are known for their creativity, intelligence, and intuition but they also tend to struggle with feelings of loneliness.

In this blog post, I will go over how you can make an INTJ feel truly loved either by being their romantic partner or just as friends.

1. Give Them Space to be Alone.

INTJs need time to recharge their mental batteries. If they feel like they have too many responsibilities, it may cause them to shut down and withdraw from others who are close to them.

Make sure that you don’t take this withdrawal personally, if anything, let him know that he is important and valued (but not smothered).

2. Make Sure They know You Are There For Them.

INTJs are known as the masters of logic, making decisions with their heads rather than their hearts.

For this reason, their partners might forget to express how much they care for them because they assume the INTJ will not care for that display of affection.

Although they might not necessarily feel the constant need to have these feelings expressed upon them, they are still human and there are times when they feel vulnerable, and in need of reassurance.

This presents a perfect opportunity for their partners to score major points, with the INTJ.

They appreciate more than you can imagine when someone is genuinely there for them when they are down.

Make sure they know you support them, by showing up when they need someone around, listening intently when they are talking passionately about what interested them.

And lending a helping hand whether physical or otherwise, doing these little things will show your support without relying on words alone.

3. Be Patient With Their Need For Solitude and Privacy.

The INTJ has a deep need for solitude and privacy. They’re introverted, meaning they recharge by being alone after spending time with people.

This doesn’t mean that the INTJ is anti-social or dislikes company, rather they just have an intense drive to be on their own.

Try not to take it personally if your INTJ wants some space from you now and then.

This is normal given how much energy socializing can consume them.

If you want something more than surface-level communication out of your INTJ, try asking open-ended questions about what’s going on in their head.

instead of demanding specific responses during conversations, remember that “no” may actually mean not yet…

4. Encourage Independence While Still Being Supportive.

Encourage Independence While Still Being Supportive.

INTJs are independent, analytical thinkers who need plenty of alone time to recharge their energy.

As a partner, you should respect this and let them go off on their own exploits without feeling the need to tag along.

This means as long as they’re not headed into danger or going against your values, you shouldn’t try too hard to get in the way of what an INTJ wants.

They’ll appreciate having someone around when it matters most.

But have an understanding that sometimes people just need some solitude so they don’t burn out trying to fit in society‘s norms.

5. Provide a “Safe Place” Where They Can Go To Recharge.

INTJs live in a world of deep, complex thoughts that sometimes show on the outside.

This can lead to them feeling drained or exhausted by the time they come home to rest and recharge.

When an INTJ feels safe with you, it will be much easier for the relationship to blossom and thrive.

You want the INTJ to automatically think of you when they need a safe place, with someone who is understanding and supportive of their complexities.

If you manage to do this, then you can be assured you have a partner or friend for life.

6. Show Interest In Their Interests And Hobbies.

There is no better feeling than when someone takes an interest in something you’re interested in.

If they spend their free time working on a project, ask them about it and give them your thoughts or ideas for how to improve it.

Give them supportive feedback, don’t just say “oh” then forget all about it seconds later, the INTJ will remember that!

7. Avoid Asking Too Many Questions About Their Feelings, Just Listen Instead.

INTJs are usually all about logic, not feelings. They’re more likely to ask questions about your day than share their own feelings with you.

This can lead to a lot of misunderstandings between the two of you.

But this doesn’t mean they don’t want to be close to you. INTJs are introverts and need plenty of alone time.

They just find it difficult to express their emotions, but will still do anything for people in their lives that matter most. This is why understanding them can be a challenge.

Other Hobbies to try

8. Talk About Eventuality.

INTJs dislike living in the present.

They’re always looking to what’s next, and generally have an answer for you about how things will play out a year from now or 10 years down the line.

INTJs are big thinkers who plan ahead and basically live in the future.

They don’t waste time being melancholic after an adverse incident, instead, they work towards making their vision a reality.

By thinking about how to make things better for themselves, or others depending on what they are working towards achieving.

Ask them questions like “What do you think will happen if we get married?” Or “How could this business grow?”.

9. Understand Their Deconstructive Nature.

INTJs are natural skeptics and thinkers. They’re in a constant opinion mode, analyzing everything.

This often means questioning other’s motives, it’s important to realize this is done without malice or impatience.

Though the INTJ might give off an air of aloofness at times because of this detachment, just know that there is room for them to change their opinions if you present your own relevant rational argument.

As partners to INTJs, it’s important that you understand their need for analysis and rationalization, because that’s all it is, understanding their mind is the way to their heart.


INTJs are introverted, analytical thinkers who enjoy solitude and independence.

They enjoy a challenge to their intellect, and they don’t like to be pressured into anything.

They also need time alone in order to recharge after being drained by the world around them.

The best way you can show an INTJ that you love them is by giving them space and privacy when needed, while still showing interest in their interests and hobbies.

Discuss future possibilities with them and let them know you’re there for them no matter what happens.

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